Christmas Eve Gift

Christina’s family has a tradition on Christmas Eve. You call someone in the family and the person who says “Christmas Eve gift” first wins. I think they used to win something like five bucks or one of those plastic candy canes filled with M&M’s, now it’s just for fun. Lame.

We survived our first Christmas at my folks house in Midland where, as usual, we racked up the gifts. Christina and I left with: new corningware, new Cuisinart cookware, four gift cards (2 to Ann Taylor, 1 to Academy, 1 to Home Depot), $300 cash, and some candy from our stockings. The boys got more than I care to write right now (mostly because I can’t remember it all). We spent a day in Odessa at the ice skating rink at Music City Mall and that night Poppy (Dad) loaded hay bales in the bed of his pick up and we went on a hayride looking at Christmas lights. It was pretty cold, but that only added to the holiday spirit. When we got back we roasted marshmallows in the fire place and had a Wii tennis tournament for prizes.

Despite all that my mom kept apologizing for a “thin” Christmas. She regretted that we weren’t on the beach in San Diego or hitting the slopes at a nice ski resort in Colorado. The past few years we’ve done destination Christmases on my parents bill. They’ve paid for all 12 of us to ski in Virginia, ski in Colorado, and spend a few nights at a fancy hotel on the Riverwalk in San Antonio, along with a visit to Sea World. This year we all gathered at their house in Midland and it was a BLAST!!!! My sister had the idea to buy a Wii for them so we spent the entire time challenging each other to tennis matches and baseball games and ski jump contests on the Wii Fit, not to mention everything I wrote about from above.

I think holiday traditions are important, but they lose their cheer when the tradition becomes all about out-doing the year before. Eventually you’ll run out of cost-efficient ways to entertain everyone while simultaneously disappointing those who wanted something different, something better. Holiday traditions, I think, are at their best when they’re simple, cheap, and involve the whole family.

Which brings me to that great Christmas tradition for all – gift giving. I’ll be perfectly honest, I’m not a very good gift giver. I think I’ve said before that I LOVE gift cards. They’re perfect in every way, and sadly not everyone has seen the holiday light and still see gift cards as the ultimate cop-out present. I think everyone should put a price and quantity limit on gifts – nothing over $20 and no more than two gifts per person. I mean seriously, spending $40 on somebody is pretty good. Besides, what do we need someone else to buy for us that we can’t buy for ourselves if we REALLY need it? I’m sucking the joy out of Christmas, aren’t I?

Of course the demographic that would be most devastated by this rule is grandparents. There’s a great article in the New York Times today about parents wrestling with ways to minimize how many gifts grandparents give their grandkids at Christmas without upsetting the grandparents. As a father who is in the thick of this struggle, I can honestly say it’s a difficult line to walk. On one hand you want your parents – especially the one who loves giving gifts WAY more than receiving them – to experience the  joy of brightening their grandkids lives with gifts at Christmas, but, and please forgive my language, HOLY CRAP WE HAVE TOO MUCH STUFF!!!!!! We started with one room in our house dedicated to toys, but the toys have now sent nomads upstairs to the landing and have even settled in the boys’ room. We have so many toys and yet every Christmas they multiply like rabbits in heat on viagra! It’s unbelievable!

Not only do we have way too many toys, we also wrestle with the more important issue of teaching our children that life isn’t about our things. In the New York Times article I mentioned, Susan Linn, a psychologist and author, is quoted as saying, “But when children have too much stuff and they constantly get more, we’re creating an environment where children are dependent on the things that corporations sell for amusement and soothing, instead of depending on their inner resources. The patterns of consumption learned in childhood can last a lifetime.”

Yes, yes, and yes again! How do you tell your kids that life isn’t about toys when 2/3 of the house is a veritable Toys R Us?

Nevertheless, Santa will come tonight with his toys for our boys, and they’re SO excited. When we get home on Friday they’ll get their gifts from Christina and I (which is sure to be a disappointment after Nana, Poppy, and Santa Claus). Finally, New Year’s Eve it’s back to Belton to get gifts from aunts, uncles, and cousins. *sigh*

I hope I don’t sound ungrateful. Gifts, obviously, are at their best when they’re given with love, and that’s what every gift has been this year. While I’d love to scale back the quantity, the quality has been magnificent. So, thank you Nana, Poppy, G-Mommy, G-Daddy, Gram, Karen, Greg, Grandma, Grandpa, April, Jeff, Jennifer, Peyton, Doug, Chelsea, and even you, Santa Claus. Thank you for loving our kids. I pray the love in our house will forever overshadow the toys that fill it.

A Few Random Thoughts

1. Since Levi can’t access my blog I’ll share this little story. Christina was a parent-helper today at his kindergarten class Christmas party. She brought sprinkles for cookie decorating and got to see Levi in his element, a world completely foreign to the rest of his family. Ms. Hager, his teacher, had all the students make a book about each student in the class. Every page of Levi’s book was from a different student. It had a picture of him at the top (always with red hair) and the phrase “Levi is a gift because…” and the kids filled in the blank. Most of them said something about Levi playing with them on the playground or helping them with something (for which I was especially proud). But one little girl who shall remain nameless, wrote something particularly interesting. She said Levi is a gift because, among other things, he has “nice skin” and that she wants him to “fall in love” with her!!!! I know!!!! A week or so ago he came home asking if he could call this girl because she gave him her phone number. Turns out she also gave it to some other kid in class, the little hussy. So Christina happened to be sitting at the same table as this girl’s parents and showed them what their little angel had written in Levi’s book. They laughed and said, well take a look at this – Levi wrote in her book that she is a gift because she, too, has “nice skin” and that HE LOVES HER!!!! What in the world!!!! It was quite humorous. A kindergarten fling. Oh to be young again!

2. Tonight is Celebrate Jesus at West Houston. If you’ve never been you really need to check it out. There are a dozen or so scenes of Jesus’ life from birth to ascension spread across our campus. You drive through, pause at each scene and watch it unfold, then drive to the next. There will be trucks pulling trailers full of hay if you’d rather do it hay-ride style. Come on out. The weather suddenly turned a shade above perfect for being out with the family tonight. I’ll be playing Jesus all night in the Garden scene when He gets arrested. A couple of teens (Jakob and Cole) are the Roman guards. I’ve quit hoping that they’ll go easy on me. I’m sure they’ll have no problem getting “into the role” of a rough and tough Roman soldier beating on Jesus.

Tomorrow night Christina and I are Jesus and the woman at the well (she’s the woman, not me). We’re only doing one shift, though, so you have to come early to hear Christina confess to all her former relationships .

3. I’m planning on running a half-marathon in 2010. Not sure when or where, so if anyone in Blogland is planning on doing one in the coming year, let me know. I’d much rather pass out with a friend near by than around all those strangers.

4. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It’s Almost Here

I feel the need to clarify something – I recently shared that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday – and it is – but I might have been a little over-the-top downplaying the Christmas season. It’s certainly up there on my favorite holiday season list. I mean, I get as giddy as the next guy about Christmas, but only when it’s officially Christmas time (a.k.a. after December 1). On Sunday we’re going to Nana and Poppy’s for a few days. It’s a nine hour drive and I can’t find any of our old Christmas CD’s, so I’ve been downloading Christmas music on iTunes all day. Talk about getting yourself in the holiday spirit! Here’s what I’ve got so far. Feel free to offer up any suggestions:

1. “Jingle Bells” – Andrea Bocelli     2. “Gloria” – Mercy Me     3. “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” – Frank Sinatra     4. “Auld Lang Syne” – Relient K     5. “Baby It’s Cold Outside” – Dean Martin    6. “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” – Harry Connick, Jr.     7. “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” – Weezer     8. “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” – Frank Sinatra     9. “What Child is This” – Andrea Bocelli with Mary J. Blidge     10. “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” – Dean Martin     11. “O Holy Night” – Mercy Me     12. “I’ve Got My Love to Keep Me Warm” – Dean Martin     13. “O Come All Ye Faithful” – Weezer

Believe it or not, Weezer has some really good Christmas stuff. How ’bout it, Blogland? What are your carols of choice for the (2nd) most wonderful time of the year?

Donation Nation

Donation Nation was the headline of a small article in this month’s Men’s Health magazine (the one with Taylor Lautner on it – easy ladies). Men’s Health put together a list of the 100 most charitable cities in America. Here’s how they did it:

“To find the most giving cities, we first factored in who’s making the largest online charitable donations during the holidays (from Convio, a software provider for nonprofits). Then we calculated the number of donations given to Goodwill Industries International for December, and the amount collected by the Salvation Army’s Red Kettle Campaign. Finally, we looked at the number of toys donated to the Marine Toys for Tots Foundation.”

The top ten most charitable cities are:

1. Madison, WI  2. Richmond, VA  3. Seattle, WA  4. Cincinnati, OH  5. Austin, TX  6. Spokane, WA  7.Columbus, SC  8. Pittsburgh, PA  9. Tampa, FL  10. Norfolk, VA

The least ten charitable cities are:

91. Jackson, MS  92. Columbus, OH (greedy Buckeyes!)  93. Riverside, CA  94. Oklahoma City, OK  95. Los Angeles, CA  96. New York, NY  97. Fresno, CA  98. Newark, NJ  99. El Paso, TX  100. Yonkers, NY

Houston, TX was number 28, scoring significantly higher than the only three cities larger in the country (Chicago – 72, Los Angeles – 95, New York – 96). Way to go, H-Town!!!

I’m curious what you do, Blogland, to spread holiday cheer. What charities do you enjoy contributing to? What charities do you think do the most good for the most people? Share your thoughts, but more importantly, share your money. ‘Tis the season!

The Most Wonderful Time…

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday for one reason: dressing. I wait 11 months to eat the cornbread and sage goodness – especially reheated on a roll around dinner time Thanksgiving night. Yes, we eat it at Christmas sometimes too, but Thanksgiving is the first taste of the year.

A hair below the dressing is the together time of Thanksgiving. It’s Christmas minus the gifts, together just to be together. The kids are bored out of their minds because all the adults do is “talk” so they have to make up games like “Invisible Football” in their grandparent’s front yard (yes, we actually played it). We crash on the couch to watch a meaningless football game, we play cards, we laugh, we tell stories and hear from the family patriarchs and matriarchs of what holidays once were like. For the Jones/McCarty houses it’s family at its best.

A whisper below togetherness (honestly, the #1 reason) is the feeling of contentment. I find it ironic that the day after we all gather at the table to share how blessed, fortunate and thankful we are for the blessings we have, we rush out the next morning at 5:00 a.m. to buy as much stuff as our debit cards can hold. Thanksgiving is too short-lived. We start making our Christmas lists after Halloween, stores display their Christmas decor in September. Christmas trees go up before the tryptophan has lost its effect.

We’re a blessed people. We’  rich. We’re well-fed. We’re more fortunate than most of the world.

Enough mushy stuff. Time to throw some elbows at BestBuy!

Soul Link

Had a good meeting today at the Heritage CofC with the Tarrant County youth ministers in Ft. Worth. We made a pitch for Soul Link and met some cool guys. The best part of the trip was getting to know Matt Atnip and Jay Blackburn a little better. Awesome guys with awesome hearts – thanks for the great conversation.

We ate at Ghengis Grill for lunch. If you’ve never been you DEFINITELY need to find one, and soon. You load up a bowl with as much stuff as you want – meats (chicken, pork, beef, shrimp, crab, scallops, etc.), veggies, spices, sauces, everything you need for a great Asian-ish dish. They cook it with your choice of rice and bring it out to you smokin’ hot. It’s relatively inexpensive, although you have to tip which always drives up the cost a few extra dollars. Seriously, find the one nearest to your house and go eat there.

We talked a lot about our responsibility toward the poor and people in need – both as individuals and as The Church. This is an area I’ve always struggled with because what I read the Bible saying about how to use our money is NOT what I do or what I see churches doing. The Bible tells us the world is God’s and everything in it, including our money. It seems like if it’s God’s money we should be a-okay with giving to a guy who asks. But we hold on to it as though it were our own and chalk it up to “good stewardship.”

I don’t know, what’s your take Blogland?

Camping and Reading

Christina and I threw our gear and boys in the car Friday and met with old college friends at Fairfield State Park for a night of camping. Camping with a bunch of ministers stinks because we all have to be at church Sunday morning, meaning we only get a good day-and-a-half to be together. Oh well, it’s a day-and-a-half worth spending.

I love camping with our boys because at 6, 3, and 18 months they’re old enough to only have fun in the outdoors – they don’t realize the frustrations of setting up tents, forgetting all useful items, fighting mosquitoes, and other annoyances we adults tend to focus on. They had fun chasing the armadillo through our camp, roasting marshmallows, throwing rocks into the lake, and playing in the tent like it was their own personal castle. I don’t know when we make the change, but at some point life becomes more about the frustrations than the joys. We carry our worries around like a fragile heirloom – we focus intensely on them, talk about them, show them to everyone whether they care or not. At some point we lose our childlikeness by seeing the bad more clearly than the good.

Oh to be a child again…

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On a separate note I’ve got some book recommendations for you. Christina read “The Shack” aloud two weekends ago while we were in the car for 9 hours. If you’re like me and put off reading it simply because everyone else was, give in and read it. It’s a great, great book.

I’m currently reading “What the Dog Saw” by Malcolm Gladwell. It’s a fascinating book about men and women who made something of themselves by seeing the world a little differently than the rest of us. It’s full of wonderful, tragic, inspiring stories.

I should be receiving my next shipment from Amazon soon with two new books – “Finding Our Way Again – The Return of Ancient Practices” by Brian McLaren, and “Christianity Beyond Belief – Following Jesus for the Sake of Others” by Todd Hunter. I’ll let you know my take after I’ve read them.

A Good Story

I finished Don Miller’s “A Million Miles in a Thousand Years” today. What a great book. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. It’s easy to read yet deeply inspiring. Here’s my takeaway:

We are capable of crafting a story worth telling with our own lives.

I met a guy today named David Beagle. As of December 15 this year he will have been sober for 19 years, yet he still goes to AA meetings and leads multiple recovery groups and Bible studies during the week. His “job” is director of the distribution center at the Impact Church of Christ here in Houston. I say “job” because to David, it is clearly more than that. Jordan and I got to watch him in action for only a half-hour or so today, but in that brief time we heard his heart for the poor, his compassion for the addict, and his sensitivity toward those of us who are oblivious to what he sees everyday. David shows up each morning at 6:00 a.m. to begin his work at the distribution center. Some days he’s at the Food Bank making his purchases, some days he’s filling bags or preparing MRE’s, and other days he’s in meetings or teaching an alcoholic about Jesus. His partially-replaced knee is the only thing strong enough to slow this man down.

I tell you about David because I think he’s living a good story on purpose. I tend to wait for the good part of the story to come to me rather than make a good story happen. I’ve been content with a life of mostly insignificant events with a few extraordinary moments scattered between. And in some ways, aren’t we all? We live vicariously through our friends who are conquering the world, but we assume those stories are only for a select few. What if those stories are for everyone – you, me, your family and mine? What if we could make a life full of stories worth telling? What would that life look like?

That’s essentially what Donald Miller’s book is about. It has me ready to start writing a story, and when that one’s done, I’ll write another.

I’d love to hear about people you know who are living good stories on purpose.

Bono and Jesus

Jones’ and Soper’s outside Reliant Stadium

From our seats – front row on the third deck directly across from the stage

The Band

Stage lights going crazy

That Bono sure draws a crowd.

 Wednesday night Christina and I joined Matt and Angela for the U2 concert at Reliant Stadium. Every seat was full and the standing-room-only floor was exactly how you think it would be. The concert was amazing – AMAZING! The band played 23 songs and stayed on stage for almost three hours, and at one point I may have cried a little.

 That Bono sure draws a crowd.

 I think it’s safe to say U2 has a massive following. I saw people from all walks of life Wednesday night – preppy, hippy, rich, poor, black, white, and everything in between. I saw a man dressed what appeared to be eastern religious clothing; I saw singles, married couples and a few gay couples. A woman sitting behind us had a British accent. It was the closest thing to the world’s population gathering in one place – all to hear one man.

 That Bono sure draws a crowd.

 Jesus drew a crowd. Mark tells us Jesus once fed 5,000 men (plus women and children) with a few loaves and fish. This was done with no billboards or Ticketmaster. Sure there were also no lights, screens, speakers, or stage, but there was a show. Healings, driving out demons, teaching like no one had ever heard, and the food! The people loved hearing Jesus teach about the Kingdom of God and how the poor are really rich, the hungry are fed, the weak are strong, etc. I can imagine them cheering when Jesus slammed the Pharisees, much like a U2 crowd cheering at Bono demanding the release of a political prisoner.

 That Jesus sure drew a crowd.

 Jesus and Bono have some similarities. Unfortunately, so do their followers. Following Bono is easy. You buy a t-shirt or two, some CD’s, and attend an event every once in a while with the rest of his followers. If you’re a hardcore fan, you sign up to be part of a campaign. Outside of that, following Bono has little effect on your day-to-day life.

 What would happen if I wrote the above paragraph substituting Jesus for Bono? Let’s try:

 Following Jesus is easy. You buy a t-shirt or two, some CD’s, and attend an event every once in a while with the rest of his followers. If you’re a hardcore fan, you sign up to be part of a campaign. Outside of that, following Jesus has little effect on your day-to-day life.

 Could this be true for you? I know it is for me much of the time. Western Christianity in many ways has been reduced to a t-shirt and church attendance. As Americans we celebrate our religious freedom, and rightly so, but has our freedom made us soft? Has our freedom removed a need for sacrifice? So far as I could tell, few people, if any, left the U2 concert before the lights came on. Everyone wanted as much as they could experience. In John 6:66, after delivering a hard teaching, John tells us that “many of (Jesus’) disciples turned back and no longer followed him.” When Jesus became more than a sideshow and free food, people bailed. Jesus made it clear that following Him meant something deeper, something harder than sitting in a pew. He said things like, “Take up your cross,” “Whoever loses his life will save it,” “sell everything you have and give to the poor.” Where is our cross? How much time do we spend preserving our life? How freely do we give to the poor?

 That Jesus sure can clear a room.

Questions

Geez Louise it’s been…okay I stopped counting…it’s been a really long time since my last post. I forget how much I enjoy blogging because it keeps me constantly thinking, critiquing, analyzing, and challenging myself. I think this is a good time to get back into it because, now hear me out, I’m really struggling with who I am, where I’m at in my walk with Jesus, and where the church is headed. It’s not a bad struggle; in fact I think it’s extremely healthy to feel uneasy sometimes about where we are as a people of God. Uneasiness gets us moving. Comfort keeps us in our seats. So I’m uneasy, and it’s got me moving.

So here’s the thing, for a very long time I’ve had a passion for the poor, the least of society. I’ve given my heart to those the world doesn’t want and the driving force behind that feeling is Jesus – these are the people Jesus gave His heart to. I feel at home, at peace, in parks full of homeless people. I get a rush when I’m at Impact in downtown Houston, I feel alive when I’m in Honduras with men and women who wear the same clothes everyday and sleep on dirt floors. I felt very close to God in Malawi sitting in a man’s home in a small village eating sima and boiled cabbage. These are the places I feel the Spirit of God. These are the places I feel myself aligned with the mission of Jesus on earth.

Here lately (specifically the last few days) I’ve been wrestling with who I am in the grand scheme of things – not just as an individual, but as a part of the Kingdom of God. I’ve been wrestling with the direction the Church is headed. I feel a deep sense that church as we know it will fail to reach our world in the next 15-20 years, maybe sooner. There are places in the U.S. where “church” has been undergoing a transformation for a while now, and the Kingdom is spreading even though there are no buildings, pews, benevolence policies, or ministry models. There are people reaching people, meeting in homes over dinner tables or in coffee shops or at restaurants, in bars and pubs, in tattoo parlors, and so on. The Kingdom is spreading in spite of the traditional Church.

This isn’t a slam on The Church. Jesus created it, God dwells among it, and the Holy Spirit works in it. The Church is holy, righteous, and good.

I think we in Bible belt, traditional churches in America must start reexamining how we approach reaching the lost. In many ways The Church is seen by people who do not claim Christianity as another institution not to be trusted. The Church is lumped in with the government, health insurance companies, investment firms, and other central societal organizations. Some believe they will never get a clear picture of what it means to be a follower of Jesus because The Church has too much to lose if we were to teach that. So instead, the belief goes, we sugar coat, we glamorize, we amaze with worldly things – large buildings, high-tech equipment, helicopters, private jets, best-selling books. The Church competes with society rather than transforming it.

One of the wonderful things about being a youth minister here at West Houston is that I get to introduce this side of Christianity to our students through things like 30-Hour Famine, mission trips to places like PUMP in Oregon, Memphis Urban Ministry in Memphis, TN, and Mission Lazarus in Honduras. We live in a pretty affluent area of Houston and it’s hard to remember sometimes that another world exists – a world of poverty, hunger, hurt, pain, life. We get glimpses of that world through these events and I can’t wait to get to them again.

It’s hard for me to know what it would be like to be saturated in a world of poverty. I’m currently at my desk in my office, listening to the quiet hum of the copier in the work room, using my wireless internet, cooled by the air conditioning, and about to go into the kitchen for a snack. It’s hard for me to understand what the world is like for those who live outside, who deal daily with stress of not knowing what the immediate future will hold. It’s hard for me to understand how Jesus feels about me sitting here at my desk, on my computer, in my cozy office. Right now I’m just full of questions about life, God, Jesus, myself, The Church, my boys, and other issues. I’ve listed them below in no particular order. Some of them came to me even as I was typing. Some of them are currently more relevant than others, but they are all contributing to an overall feeling of unease.

And so it begins:

- How can my world look more like Jesus’ world?

- How can I make the Kingdom of Heaven a little brighter for the people around me?

- Where is God at work in my world? How do I join Him in it?

- Is it okay to help everybody just because they ask? Should we take Matthew 25, the story of the rich man and Lazarus, and other teachings of Jesus seriously when it comes to giving, serving, helping?

- Is God pleased with The Church as it exists today?

- What should The Church be doing that we’re totally missing?

- How do we all join together – megachurches, traditional churches, parachurches, house churches – to channel the Kingdom of Heaven on earth?

- How much is The Church hindered by our pride and arrogance? How many decisions in The Church get made that are borne out of selfishness, a desire to be bigger, richer, more powerful? How does God feel about those exactly?

- Where is there selfishness in my own world and in the student ministry at WHCC? What must change if we’re going to start reaching students we’ve never reached?

- Should everyone be poor? Jesus was. Is that the best way to live? It seems like Jesus was God’s way of not only redeeming humanity, but also saying, “Here’s what life is supposed to look like. I created it and here’s how I would live it if I were human.”

- I don’t read the word “responsible” or “irresponsible” in the Bible. Maybe it’s there and I’m just missing it. It seems to me that we use the idea of responsibility as a reason not to take risks. Responsibility is dependent on human wisdom. A lot of what Jesus said and taught didn’t really make sense. Is responsibility a crutch, an excuse, a way to maintain our comfort?

- What do I want my children to know about the Kingdom of Heaven? Do I want them to know how to do church or how to be like Jesus? The obvious answer is to be like Jesus. But how do I do that without simply making them good at church? How do I teach them that the people taking Jesus into bars and pubs, coffee shops and restaurants, but never go to a church building, are just as much a part of the Kingdom of Heaven as we are (if not more so)?

- How far am I supposed to go with trusting the Lord? Should I go home now, throw out all my food, and wait for God to show up with a basket of bread, turkey, barbecue Lays, and lemon-lime Gatorade? Should we go buy a cow and get our milk the way God intended? Should I have a garden in my backyard with all our fruits and vegetables growing in it? Am I sinning by buying food for more than one day at a time?